For the past 2 years I’ve wondered why testing for 4th Dan in Tae Kwon Do required doing 1000 bows. I had looked up information on the internet and discovered this was a technique for “ clearing the mind” or obtaining an empty mind. Others feel it helps one repent of earthly desires or cleanses our karma. All of this was “book knowledge” until I undertook this practice myself. Nothing I read prepared me for the actual experience of 1000 bows.
Background
One thousand bows has been part of the mediation experience of Korean Zen Buddism (Seon) for many years. Prostrations were likened to the 'emergency measure' for clearing the mind. They are a very powerful technique for seeing the karma of a situation because both the mind and the body are involved. Something that might take days of sitting to digest may be digested in a much shorter time with prostrations. The usual practice is to do 1000 bows a day (actually 1080) spread out throughout the day. (1) The idea was to merge body and mind before engaging in mediation so that once the mind was cleared, the practioner could more readily gain insight and understand themselves. One interesting story I read told about the zen nun “Sunim”. She was determined to learn zen buddism but at that time there were not many women allowed to practice. After sitting in the cold outside the monastery for weeks, having water thrown on her, the master Song Chol agreed to take her as a student if she completed 100,000 bows at the Songju temple. It took her a week but after a few additional hassles, she was accepted into training. So in this case, bowing was used to prove intent and devotion. Most would have given up after several thousand bows but Sunim’s dedication proved her worthy to become a student.
According to Zen Master Seung Sahn, “bowing practices also cleanse our karma. He thought that for every 108 bows, we “cleansed” all karma accumulated in the previous day. He called it a “powerful practice – mantra for the body. (2) At other monasteries in Korea, it’s thought that prostration bowing helped rid the mind of earthly desires and allowed it to focus on higher thoughts rather than the mundane. (4) This would also promote clearing the mind or creating an empty mind which is also a primary goal of zen buddism and Taoism.
In Taoism, emptiness is viewed as a state of stillness which develops the "pure mind". The Tao Te Ching claims that emptiness is related to the "Tao, the substance of the whole universe. Emptiness is the "state of mind of the Taoist disciple who follows the Tao", who has successfully emptied the mind "of all wishes and ideas not fitted with the Tao's Movement". For a person who attains a state of emptiness, the "still mind is the mirror of heaven and earth, the glass of all things", a state of "vacancy, stillness, placidity, tastelessness, quietude, silence, and non-action" which is the "perfection of the Tao and its characteristics, the "mirror of the universe" and the "pure mind". (6)
In Buddhism, the realization of emptiness of inherent existence is a "state of pure consciousness” in which the practitioner realizes all particular objects and images to be appearances of the subjective mind. In Buddhist philosophy, attaining a realization of emptiness of inherent existence is seen as the permanent cessation of suffering. Emptiness in Buddhism is also about the thought-free wakefulness that athletes and musicians might experience when they are in the "zone" or "flow". This emptiness is not merely voidness but always contains cognizance – awareness of movement, space and objects. (6)
Finally, the Dalai Lama argues that a Tantric yoga trainee needs to realize emptiness of inherent existence before they can go on to the "highest Yoga Tantra initiation"; when realizing the innate emptiness of inherent existence of the mind, this is the "fundamental innate mind of clear light, which is the subtlest level of the mind", where all the "energy and mental processes are withdrawn or dissolved", so that all that appears to the mind is "pure emptiness". As well, emptiness is "linked to the creative Void, meaning that it is a state of complete receptivity and perfect enlightenment", the merging of the "ego with its own essence", which Buddhists call the "Clear Light" (6).
Beginning 1000 bows
When I first started bowing, I thought two things; 1) THIS WAS GOING TO TAKE FOREVER; and 2) this was really boring. My mind was going everywhere except concentrating on what I was doing. I was wondering what Lauren was going to do in New York. I tried to figure out where I wanted to live. I wondered if I should keep looking for a new job. I tried to figure out my relationship with my husband. At one point I was even wondering if I had left enough food for the dog since I was gone for a few days. The first 300 bows went fairly quickly, in a half hour because I was rushing through them without a lot of thought about what I was actually doing. My goal was to get through it as quickly as possible. I saw this as a purely physical exercise, designed to test my endurance. I just threw myself on the ground, in no rhythm with the idea of cranking them out as you would do push ups in class. Although I had read about the purpose of bowing, I really didn’t get the whole mind clearing aspect. I just wanted to get it over with and have time to stretch out and get ready for the actual testing. At this time, I didn’t understand what I was doing.
The second 300 bows
By about the 400th bow, I was definitely warmed up, sweating and starting to feel my legs whenever I kneeled. By that time I was thinking about why I was doing this and had stopped worrying about the rest of my life. I had to force myself to continue moving since my legs definitely did not want to cooperate. At that point I just focused on counting. It was also about this time that I noticed I was bowing in a spiral pattern. I had the lights off so the only light was coming from the hall and my eyes were shut. With each bow, I turned a little to the right so eventually I made a complete circle. However I didn’t turn evenly so at one point I hit my head on the chairs even though I started in the center of the room facing the flags.
After 500 bows, I lay prone “in the yoga corpse position” for about 15 minutes. As I lay there my head was vibrating and I was trying to do breathing exercises so I could go back to bowing. At that time my main thought was “Derek totally lied about this”. He told me it wasn’t that bad. Maybe not for a 23 year old but for me each bow after 500 was really tough.
Saved by the Rain
After 700 bows I was completely ready to give up. My hands, knees and toes were red from touching the floor over and over. I thought nothing was worth this. My head was spinning, I was alternating between sweating and having cold chills. I felt like I was going to throw up. I had been bowing for about 1 and ½ hours, starting a little before 5 am. It was now 6:30 and I had 300 more to go. At that point I really did not think I would finish. Each bow was a major effort but on the plus side I wasn’t thinking about my daughter, my dog or my husband any longer.…. About that time, a loud thunderstorm broke outside. Lightning flashed through the doors and I could see the morning was here. Rain started pelting the ceiling in the dojang. It beat in the same rhythm I was already moving to. I don’t know whether I subconsciously changed my pattern of movement but it seemed like the rain was hitting and drumming on the roof with each movement I made, following my pattern. Hand, hand, knee, knee, wrist, wrist, forehead, hand, hand, stand, fold hands - each beat was drummed by the rain hitting the same exact pattern. I thought I was making the rain beat to my movements – I was controlling nature. Actually I was nature. Now I realize I must have subconciously adapted my movement to the pattern the rain was making or there was no pattern and I imagined the whole thing. During the last 100 bows I didn’t feel anything - I was the rain hitting the floor. Afterwords, I lay on the floor and heard the thunder and gradually came back from where-ever I had been. I meditated until I heard Stephanie come in which I think was for about an hour. I felt the same way I did after Lauren was born 20 years ago. Actually the whole process is like being in labor – except you can’t decide to stop labor! The same feeling of being exhausted, empty, and at the same time at peace and contented with the world occurs with bowing. You also have the same feeling of being in another world, totally spaced out, almost as if you were on drugs or drinking several shots of Soju. Additionally, I could feel my pulse pounding in my hands, feet and head. This lasted throughout testing. I also felt what seemed like hot flashes going up my back.
Testing
I stretched and walked through a couple of forms while other students were arriving and warming up. I didn’t really talk to anyone. During the beginning of testing, just before we started, I was so out of it, Derek came over and ordered me to focus. I was still pretty spaced during pushups, jumping kicks and kicking combinations. However, once forms started, I started getting more energy and focus from somewhere. I could feel my hands and feet pounding as I moved and I actually felt stronger doing Choong Jang than Chon ji, which still doesn’t make sense to me. The only thing I’ve been able to figure out is that I must have been absorbing QI from somewhere while I was moving during forms. The rest of testing went ok. I had energy except for getting dizzy just before trying my first fingertip strike. I focused on the second strike and didn’t even feel it.
The only other unusual thing about the day was breaking bricks. Usually the bricks crack in the middle all the way down the pile. This time I saw my hand hitting the bricks as if it was happening in slow motion. As I hit the first brick, dust flew up around my hand and the bricks fell in pieces instead of cracking in the middle. I could see the dust settling on top of my hand as the fourth brick broke. Once I finished, time sped up again, and testing was over. I survived. I had an experience I doubt I will ever repeat and one which I’ll never forget. I now know about bowing – not mind knowledge from reading but mind and body knowledge from the Joy of doing 1000 bows.
References:
1. http://www.kwanumzen.org/practice/bowing.html. The Kwan Um School of Zen. Accessed July 26, 2009.
2. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kwan_Um_School_of_Zen. The Kwan Um School of Zen. Accessed July 26, 2009
3. http://wildfoxzen.blogspot.com/2009/02/back-from-ann-arbor-buddhist-temple.html. Accessed July 26, 2009. Accessed July 26, 2009
4. http://www.travelblog.org/Asia/South-Korea/Gyeongsangbuk-do/Gyeongju/Golgulsa-Temple/blog-196148.html. Golgulsa Temple. Accessed July 26, 2009.
5. http://www.koreanbuddhism.net/hwadu/cat.asp?cat_seq=5. Korean Buddism. Accessed July 26, 2009
6. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emptiness Emptiness. Accessed July 26, 2009
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